A word of advice on high school
friends…At the end of High School and even the first year or so of college it
seems so important to keep in touch with our friends from home. We value their
friendship because it holds an element of consistency as our lives change. The
world of college is totally new as we are thrown into an abyss filled with
tougher classes, brand new people and a new sense of responsibility as we
search for our independence. During this time of transition we can find
ourselves all alone in our dark crowded dorm room late at night nostalgic for
the days when we walked into the school cafeteria knowing our best friends were
sitting at the same old table in the corner. Our old friends remind us of home,
they are our safety net. In a time like today when we have the internet and
cell phones we can call or text them and in an instant we hear their voice
(real or virtual) and we’ll feel at home.
It takes time to make new friends,
for some it takes longer than others but either way those strong friendships
aren’t built over night. But in time it will happen, we reach a point in which
our roommate is more family than our best friend from high school ever was. As
we continue to adjust to school and create new ties with new people the old
friends slip further and further to the back of our minds. Maybe they’ll come
back into our lives once we return home or maybe they’ll just be a friendly
face we pass in the grocery store. Either way our lives no longer revolve
around them.
It’s important to remember that
it’s okay to move on. Life is about change, nothing will ever stay entirely the
same and that really is for the best. I’ve found over the past few months that
holding onto old friendships is useless. It can be hard to move on and make new
friends but it does happen. As someone who has had a bit of a falling out with
a number of people I once considered my good friends, it can be hard to find
the strength to find faith in new friends and trust that they won’t be exactly
the same as the others who I once knew.
These friendships are fleeting,
they pass almost as quickly as they came. Time moves on, we evolve and it’s all
for the best. College is a time for growth, even in the first month we change
drastically, becoming more and more of the person we want to be. This is an
opportunity to leave behind parts of who we were which may entail losing a few
of our older friends to make room for the new friends to come.
It’s important not to let old
friendships hold you back and prevent you from becoming who you are meant to
be. When you lose something you make room for something better to come. There
will be times when you start going through the old pictures on your Facebook or
phone and you will start to regret losing those friendships. You have to
remember that that was a long time ago, in a different time when you were
younger. Remember how much you have changed and what little has stayed the same
and then don’t forget that your old friends have changed too. You just don’t mesh
anymore. It is okay to remember and appreciate the memories that you had together
but that is it then move on and spend time with all of the new friends you have
made where you are now. It is much better to have friends at school than a few
at home who you will only see a few times a year now. This is a new chapter in
your life, live and write it well.
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